I was just thinking about how much I wanted to learn more about the entire party, and while Vivika was certainly not the character I was the most invested in or curious about, this line did give me a bit of a feeling of my stomach dropping:
“At first glance it looked as though Vivika had drifted off to sleep during her watch.”
I do really like this (sorry, Vivika) though. Now I am not only invested in the rest, but worried for them as well.
This had me laughing: “‘What is it? Baby?' Bab sounded on the verge of losing it.”
This line landed for me, I really like it: “Why make friends, when friends could die as easily as enemies? Best to be alone.”
I also *loved* this line: “In this world, Kees knew, it did not take long to move on from a sudden death. It seemed about eighty miles would do it.”
I think the last section of this chapter is also something to be very proud of. I was completely engrossed in that exposition, and it didn’t lose me even for a second. I love having it be filtered through Kees’ perspective, I am really glad to hear Vivika described as the real deal, and desperately curious about everyone else.
Can I share a wild hunch? I think Estel is *not* a fake. Can’t wait to find out.
I’m very attached to Babs right now as well. And more than a little scared for his well being.
Ah, you leave the best comments! Again, the things you’ve picked up on and enjoyed makes me very happy. (And sorry about Vivika...!)
As I’m sure you know by now, the act of writing can seem a solitary pursuit. Often, people will talk about this and how hard it can be when things aren’t going smoothly, or as planned—what fewer people mention is how, when it IS going well, or you knock out a line you adore, it’s really not possible to immediately share that with anyone. The depth of context needed to do so makes it almost impossible so, when you pick up on lines I remember being very proud of whilst writing them, that is a much-delayed gratification. Thank you.
Obviously there’ll be no spoilers from me!
I do hope you keep enjoying the tale. There’s lots to come (even after this novella!). Thanks again.
I was not ready for the start of this chapter!
I was just thinking about how much I wanted to learn more about the entire party, and while Vivika was certainly not the character I was the most invested in or curious about, this line did give me a bit of a feeling of my stomach dropping:
“At first glance it looked as though Vivika had drifted off to sleep during her watch.”
I do really like this (sorry, Vivika) though. Now I am not only invested in the rest, but worried for them as well.
This had me laughing: “‘What is it? Baby?' Bab sounded on the verge of losing it.”
This line landed for me, I really like it: “Why make friends, when friends could die as easily as enemies? Best to be alone.”
I also *loved* this line: “In this world, Kees knew, it did not take long to move on from a sudden death. It seemed about eighty miles would do it.”
I think the last section of this chapter is also something to be very proud of. I was completely engrossed in that exposition, and it didn’t lose me even for a second. I love having it be filtered through Kees’ perspective, I am really glad to hear Vivika described as the real deal, and desperately curious about everyone else.
Can I share a wild hunch? I think Estel is *not* a fake. Can’t wait to find out.
I’m very attached to Babs right now as well. And more than a little scared for his well being.
This story is getting better and better!
Ah, you leave the best comments! Again, the things you’ve picked up on and enjoyed makes me very happy. (And sorry about Vivika...!)
As I’m sure you know by now, the act of writing can seem a solitary pursuit. Often, people will talk about this and how hard it can be when things aren’t going smoothly, or as planned—what fewer people mention is how, when it IS going well, or you knock out a line you adore, it’s really not possible to immediately share that with anyone. The depth of context needed to do so makes it almost impossible so, when you pick up on lines I remember being very proud of whilst writing them, that is a much-delayed gratification. Thank you.
Obviously there’ll be no spoilers from me!
I do hope you keep enjoying the tale. There’s lots to come (even after this novella!). Thanks again.
Strong writing. Active, action-packed sentences. Lively dialogue. Well done!
Thanks Jim! I'm really happy you are along for the journey.